Take the time to say 'yes'
Women's Opinion / / August 12, 2017
unlikely that any conscientious person will be able to refuse the request to a colleague, friend, and even more so, boss.And even authoritarian, rigid individual've never hesitates to say "no."In most such cases, the consent totally disgusting kind, but of pity, respect for who asks, finally, the nature of the weakness leads to promises that sometimes ... absolutely unfeasible.
Do not make promises and say "yes", if there is any doubt that they will be executed.However, many of us have succumbed to a moment of weakness, did not buy the right product because the seller is called sympathy, or has the gift of persuasion.
«Learn to speak clearly" no. "This is one of the most essential skills in the world;your life will be unceasing anguish as long as you learn not to give an answer without hesitation and the categorical tone ... "- George Bernard Shaw said.
The reasons that we do not dare to say "no" can be, besides those already mentioned, and others.But be that as it may, the timidity and indecision,
Bound word "yes", do you feel that your personal space violated, infringed upon the interests, but the problem still needs to be solved, not to pass unnecessary, irresponsible.Sometimes the inability to say 'no' leads to weight problems and other stressful mood.
«refuses firm tone, without any doubt, but first think through everything.It's better to just say "no" than by giving "yes", after some time off from the word, "- said in a textbook for high schools of psychology.
Psychologists have developed a step by step instructions for just such half-hearted people, who can not squeeze out it is the word "no."First, it is necessary to say a few times firmly to himself: "No, I will not do it."
When these words will be familiar to you, please contact them to have, who are forced to refuse the request.This waiver must be clearly argue your entire look and even posture must demonstrate determination and confidence in his position.Sometimes it is possible to ask for forgiveness, but in most cases this is not worth doing.
It is possible that the source will convince you insist, and the main thing - Adhere to the foregoing, and not to succumb to weakness.It is best to speak the same phrase, for example,
«I understand you, but to do this I can not, for reasons which have already been said»
«I enter into your position", but to help in thisI can not".
Such a waiver asking for less offended than just the word "no."Do not engage in verbal battles, especially if you know their weakness - you eventually can be persuaded to do something that would not be desirable.
Not really those who seek to act correctly to win a reputation as a sort of shirt-guy, trouble-free and always ready to help, while often forgetting about their own interests.What makes many of us to be led by superiors, colleagues and friends?In the first case it is elementary unwillingness to offend the boss, the other two causes may be different.For example, low self-esteem, to gain a foothold even in childhood and often imposed by parents.
man think that he alone does not mean anything in the eyes of others, but if it is the right and left to make promises and tirelessly to fulfill them, that's when ... Is it any wonder that in such a state of things others quickly get used to and stopreckon with the fail-safe?
Intelligence, an example of the parents do not allow to refuse lodging or even a fairly long stay though unfamiliar person, although a friend.If conditions permit, and such a society like the owner - then everything would be fine, but it is often the other way ... In this case, politely but firmly refuse - the best way out.